My Background
As a child life specialist
at Connecticut
Children's Medical Center, I spent several
years assisting children and families on medical/surgical
floors, in the hematology/oncology clinic, emergency
room and pediatric intensive care unit. My experiences
supporting children and families throughout
their hospitalization often included preparation,
education and support to help everyone understand
what was happening.
Assisting children and families
and helping them cope with illness, injury and
trauma taught me a great deal about what families
may need to get through difficult times. As
a child life specialist in a children's hospital,
I found that I was able to empathize with families
during all aspects of hospitalization. I recognized
the importance of individualized psychosocial
care for families and did my very best to provide
compassionate care.
Unfortunately, not all children
get better and go home. As part of my role as
a child life specialist I had far too many opportunities
to guide families through extremely difficult
times such as sudden and anticipatory death
and the grief process. Over time I became increasingly
aware of the lack of resources that were available
throughout the community, as well as the need
for continued support after the death of a child.
In 1998 a colleague and I developed
The Bereavement Support Group for Children
at Connecticut
Children's Medical Center, the first of
its kind in the state of Connecticut. A year
later we were fortunate enough to present at
a national conference in California about how
to start a bereavement support group for children
dealing with the death of a sibling.
We all know that at some point
in our lives we will have to experience loss
and the feelings of grief. These feelings have
an unusual way of creeping up on you, often
when you least expect it. Over the years as
I experienced the deaths of more children, I
found that I often I needed to revisit my own
grief feelings, especially related to the 1992
murder of one of my best friends, as well as
the deaths of both of my grandmothers. I believe
that I have become much more sensitive to the
needs of others who are grieving and more aware
of the many layers of the grief process through
both my personal and professional experiences.
Eventually I made the transition
to working in hospice and became the coordinator
of special children's bereavement program outside
of Boston. For almost three years I provided
support to children and families in their homes,
in groups and in schools. I also developed and
implemented a children's bereavement camp, as
well as a family bereavement day.
Within the community I responded
to local crisis situations and customized grief
related trainings and workshops for adults interested
in learning more about the grief process and
ways that they could help children. In addition,
I also founded Hope and Healing which was a
consulting service that provided counseling
to children dealing with serious illness, grief
and loss.
In May of 2005 I graduated with a Masters in
Social Work (MSW). Since that time I have been
a school counselor, as well as a therapist for
children and families dealing with a variety
of issues, including grief. I
am grateful to have had such wonderful career
opportunities. One of the most exciting roles
I have taken on as of the fall of 2005 has been
as an adjunct faculty member in the New
England Institute at Mount Ida College in
Newton, MA. I currently teach courses to prospective
funeral directors and bereavement counselors
which include; Clinical Skills in Grief Counseling,
as well as Current Events in Death, Dying and
Bereavement, Senior Practicum and Senior Seminar
and Social Systems-Social Supports.
Hoping Skills Company
In 2001 I met Linda Crawford.
Instantaneously I recognized her passion for
helping others who were trying to deal with
grief. The first time we met, I was immediately
drawn towards her enthusiasm and energy. Linda
wasn't just a bereaved mother trying to pacify
her grief she was a person trying to make a
difference in the lives of others who have been
forced to face serious illness, grief or loss.
Shortly after we met, Linda
and I began experimenting with ideas for an
all-inclusive children's grief-related coping
kit that would meet the needs of children in
six different age groups. Our original kit quickly
developed into a product line that included
four additional kits; our adult
kit, pet
loss kit, serious illness
kit and patriotic
kit.
Linda and I also collaborated
to write two helpful booklets based on the lack
of information available to adults interested
in understanding children's grief processes
and ways to talk with children about difficult
subjects. Combining our experiences we utilized
my expertise in child development and Linda's
expertise as a bereaved parent to write, A
Guidebook for Adults Helping Children and Teens
Cope through Serious Illness, Grief and Loss
and A Guidebook to Help You Prepare
Children and Teens for Wakes, Funerals and Memorial
Services which are both available as
downloadable files. Click Here for
our booklets. By 2003, our dreams to help
others heal had become a reality and Hoping
Skills Company, LLC (a Limited Liability Corporation)
and the Tomauro® Kit were born.
In addition to meeting the
needs of adults who are grieving, Linda and
I truly value the importance of providing age-appropriate
tools to help children express themselves through
art and play. As a child life specialist and
social worker with a degree in art therapy,
I know how even the simplest forms of the expressive
arts can easily facilitate meaning and hope
for youngsters dealing with difficult situations.
As a parent, Linda understands the importance
of giving children the tools they need to cope
and celebrate life. We believe that our Hopeful
Keepsake Collection and our customized
sympathy gifts and gift
baskets contain the best possible combinations
of specially selected practical, high quality,
meaningful and useful products.
Future Plans
Both Linda and I are very eager
to expand our business so that we may reach
out to as many people as possible. We are committed
to developing new kits and gathering new products
that can help children and adults dealing with
loss related events. In addition to my commitment
to product development at Hoping Skills Company,
I continue to provide workshops and trainings
in the U.S. and Canada to educate others about
children and grief.
I enjoy consulting with funeral
homes and I plan to continue writing about the
importance of preparing children who want to
attend wakes, funerals and memorial services.
Be sure to click here
if you would like to receive our monthly
grief-related newsletter or if you would
like to see an excerpt from my article in the
The Director magazine
for funeral directors.
Thank you for taking the time
to read about me. Linda and I are both very
proud to be able to pass along to you what we
have learned on our grief journeys.
Peace and healing to you and
the people you care about.
- Cindy
